Finally had my first midwife’s appointment. It’s the appointment I should have had before I had my ultrasound scan and before the chromosome screening test.
She was about two hours late! Apparently she got lost. She was expected at 3pm - at which time I was passing out in bed, there has been way too much activity for me and LD in the past few days and my stomach still hurts from the CVS – all I wanted to do all day was go to sleep. I forced myself to stay awake because I was expecting her, though after 3:30 I was hoping she wouldn’t come so I could sleep in peace. By this time I had started harassing Mr Doright for cake – mainly because I don’t think I had had enough to eat (I have been too tired to cook) but also because I wanted cake – nothing fancy just a two layer Victoria sponge sprinkled with icing sugar and strawberry jam and proper whipped cream (not that crap out of an aerosol can) in between the layers.
Sorry got distracted there (note to self bake cake when you have the energy). Where was I? The midwife…she was a medium sized black lady, originally from Sierra Leone (I asked because her accent made it obvious she wasn’t born here). Her speech and her general manner were reassuringly slow.
She came in breathing rather heavily, like she had been running and waddled up the stairs – she had the air of one of those grandma types, though she was much too young, very earth motherly though. I was relieved that she was black because I wasn’t in the mood to start explaining the nuances of how I felt about the hospital staff’s behaviour towards us last Thursday.
She calmed me down greatly (I have been really angry for three days now), firstly by being outraged by the way we were treated on Thursday and secondly by being honest. She even let me rant a bit till I just got tired and she could get a word in ☺. She admitted that though UCH is a good hospital, she was aware that a number of the staff focused a little too much on the research side and that that coloured the way they dealt with the public. She also apologised for the way we were treated and hoped that we didn’t change hospital as a result. She pointed out that even if we did there is no guarantee that the people will behave any better, as there is always a possibility that the people you meet had ulterior motives. Given that all the hospitals I am looking at are NHS, generally the same type of staff will people them and it would really be a matter of luck who we get and how they behave. She did say she suspected there was nothing wrong with LD as the whole nasal bone thing was a bit of sham as LD is a black baby – she was very shocked that no-one told us the screening was voluntary.
Unfortunately as I am going with the NHS she won’t be my personal midwife – I will see whoever is available when I go for my visits or have my baby but she reassured me that the hospital had some very good midwives (Vee excepted) and I will be in good hands. My community midwife, who I will see more regularly, is currently on holiday at the moment so she is just filling in for her.
She recommended that we request an audience with the senior managers at the ultrasound screening and foetal medicine unit, just to get some closure regarding the occurrences of Thursday. I think it may be a good idea as I am still very angry about the whole thing. She helpfully gave us some names before we went through the booking form that wasn’t that interesting (apart from confirming the fact the screening is voluntary) and she took yet more blood. They test for HIV, Hepatitis B, syphilis (!?), diabetes, sickle cell and a bunch of other stuff I can not remember – she took a vial for each! Doright has taken to calling me his little pin cushion because of the number of needles that I have had stuck into me over the last few days.
She packed my bits and pieces into a Tupperware box and then into a rucksack. Then she left and I went to try and take a nap again.
She was about two hours late! Apparently she got lost. She was expected at 3pm - at which time I was passing out in bed, there has been way too much activity for me and LD in the past few days and my stomach still hurts from the CVS – all I wanted to do all day was go to sleep. I forced myself to stay awake because I was expecting her, though after 3:30 I was hoping she wouldn’t come so I could sleep in peace. By this time I had started harassing Mr Doright for cake – mainly because I don’t think I had had enough to eat (I have been too tired to cook) but also because I wanted cake – nothing fancy just a two layer Victoria sponge sprinkled with icing sugar and strawberry jam and proper whipped cream (not that crap out of an aerosol can) in between the layers.
Sorry got distracted there (note to self bake cake when you have the energy). Where was I? The midwife…she was a medium sized black lady, originally from Sierra Leone (I asked because her accent made it obvious she wasn’t born here). Her speech and her general manner were reassuringly slow.
She came in breathing rather heavily, like she had been running and waddled up the stairs – she had the air of one of those grandma types, though she was much too young, very earth motherly though. I was relieved that she was black because I wasn’t in the mood to start explaining the nuances of how I felt about the hospital staff’s behaviour towards us last Thursday.
She calmed me down greatly (I have been really angry for three days now), firstly by being outraged by the way we were treated on Thursday and secondly by being honest. She even let me rant a bit till I just got tired and she could get a word in ☺. She admitted that though UCH is a good hospital, she was aware that a number of the staff focused a little too much on the research side and that that coloured the way they dealt with the public. She also apologised for the way we were treated and hoped that we didn’t change hospital as a result. She pointed out that even if we did there is no guarantee that the people will behave any better, as there is always a possibility that the people you meet had ulterior motives. Given that all the hospitals I am looking at are NHS, generally the same type of staff will people them and it would really be a matter of luck who we get and how they behave. She did say she suspected there was nothing wrong with LD as the whole nasal bone thing was a bit of sham as LD is a black baby – she was very shocked that no-one told us the screening was voluntary.
Unfortunately as I am going with the NHS she won’t be my personal midwife – I will see whoever is available when I go for my visits or have my baby but she reassured me that the hospital had some very good midwives (Vee excepted) and I will be in good hands. My community midwife, who I will see more regularly, is currently on holiday at the moment so she is just filling in for her.
She recommended that we request an audience with the senior managers at the ultrasound screening and foetal medicine unit, just to get some closure regarding the occurrences of Thursday. I think it may be a good idea as I am still very angry about the whole thing. She helpfully gave us some names before we went through the booking form that wasn’t that interesting (apart from confirming the fact the screening is voluntary) and she took yet more blood. They test for HIV, Hepatitis B, syphilis (!?), diabetes, sickle cell and a bunch of other stuff I can not remember – she took a vial for each! Doright has taken to calling me his little pin cushion because of the number of needles that I have had stuck into me over the last few days.
She packed my bits and pieces into a Tupperware box and then into a rucksack. Then she left and I went to try and take a nap again.
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